I feel pretty lucky that I’ve been able to breastfeed my little girl for as long as I have. The connection and the bond we have made is something she and I will only share. And that to me is priceless. There also comes a time when I want my body back, like, right now. And as much as I want it, nobody told me how hard it would be.

My daughter is 17 months.  She pats her chest when she wants to breastfeed and it is the cutest thing. And man, oh man, does she get moody when she’s hungry. I guess she takes after me, lol.  I’ve been waiting for her to want to ween and be done with breastfeeding. But the days are going by and the further we get along the more I want to be done.  I want my body back.  So I’ve actively been trying to cut down on the nursing sessions and how long they go for.  Which isn’t always easy.  Nighttime nursing will definitely be the last to go and that’s fine. During the day we managed to cut down on nursing sessions because she will eat solids. Which is another blog post on it’s own. She isn’t the most motivated eater.  But what I didn’t know was the affect that cutting down on nursing sessions would have on my body.

Holy hormones. Yeah, hormones. And my hormones make me want to be alone, eating bread, and maybe hiding in the bathroom. Maybe crying while watching a silly rom-com.  Since we started cutting back I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with me! I was waking up so tired, even after a good night sleep. It makes me quiet, not social and just wanting to be alone. But when your a mom, you are never actually alone.  And all of this was stressing me out because I couldn’t for the life of me figure out why!

It was only two days ago that I really started to think about.  I knew I wasn’t depressed.  Ok, the lack of sunshine in PDX right now isn’t helping. But. I’m not someone who just wants to hid under my daughters minion blanket and sneak cookies. (I love cookies.)

So what is a person to do in this situation?! It’s not easy. Heck, it’s not easy to even come to terms with it! We all react differently and nobody will respond the same.  The only thing you really can do is try to communicate with your partner/husband/baby daddy/support person and tell them what’s up. I know I’m not easy to be around when I’m like this and that sucks. But I try to keep about my day with working out, playing with Evelyn and then relaxing with my hubby at night.  It will also be super important to have time to yourself otherwise the world will feel really heavy.

So don’t do this alone! Talk with your partner and just alert them that your hormones are probably going to go out of wack (again) and that you just need them on your side until you are fully done with breastfeeding. It’s not easy, but we aren’t alone and we don’t have to be alone.   Just always keep looking at your cute fun photos from the day.

Stay momstrong!

Please feel free to post any stories, comments, concerns or questions on this post.  And keep them positive!